Searching for a job can be one of the greatest stressors in our adult lives, and few of us are immune to the pressure. But we can help ourselves not let our anxiety get the better of us if we set our focus on the three pillars of an effective search.

Awareness

1. Self-awareness: Learn your strengths and what environment works best for you. Know your deal-breakers. Become aware of what brings you to a better place — the organizational goals and day-to-day activities that get you excited about coming to work — and what you merely tolerate because it is familiar and therefore comfortable.

The advice to become more self-aware is widely offered but less often followed. We get so caught up in the search that we don’t stop to ask what we are seeking. What can you learn about yourself? Listen to what is going on inside of you and take steps to externalize and understand it. Most of us can appreciate what energizes and plagues us if we allow ourselves to value it.

2. Audience/role awareness: If the first step is knowing your own needs and priorities, the second is focusing your efforts on finding a job to match. Pitch yourself to a receptive audience if you aim to get results.

As a career coach, I have seen candidates try to push themselves through walls, metaphorically speaking, trying to land jobs that were horrible in terms of fit. They could not seem to land anything because they were going for the wrong jobs.

This does not mean you should only go for jobs that have no “downsides” — those do not exist. It does mean finding a job that has enough upside to make the downsides worth it to you, a role with which you connect on a fundamental level. The downsides should be small detractors — in other words, not a main thrust of the job itself.